=Favorite Christmas Songs=

Plain and simple.
I'd like to know what your favorite
Christmas/holiday song is...

(reply asap)

Poem: "Modern Day Princess"

Life is more than make believe
Sometimes it's hard to face reality
More and more as time goes on
You'll find yourself standing in war's rising dawn

It will be severe and bloody
Boys will be many, princes will be few
As a modern day princess
Your Father's kingdom is counting on you

A most precious gem you hold
Your heart, held high in an ivory tower
Guarded not by will and desire
But by patience, the purest of fire

Kindle well that flame
From it internal beauty will glow
And from that true love can grow

Lovely modern day princess
I'm no more a warrior than you
But this fight for tomorrow begins today
And through the battle,
By your side I will stay

My name is hope
My cause is just
Bow in grace
In God put your trust

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I don't think I'm quite finished tweaking with this one.
But...this is a fresh poem from my heart to all the up-and-coming young ladies.
Such as my beautiful little sister,Aine(pronounced On-ya) who is now 11.

"Senior Shots"

A little footnote for my beloved ex-teacher, Amber Glanville...

She is an aspiring photographer. I was blessed to have her do a photoshoot with me this last Fall.
If you'd like to look at maybe 0.5% of all the photos she took you may go to her blog page at http://www.ofamberphotography.blogspot.com
All the pics of people on there (so far) live in my small wonderful community.
I'm surrounded by beautiful people! :)

Anyways,check it out if you'd like.

Almost Christmas 2008

Man alot has happened this year! So much...SO much has changed.
When everything changes you really see the stark reality of what will always stay the same. That one thing in my life is God. A growing gratitude from year to year builds inside my heart towards everything that goes on in my life because of His incredible plan. Such amazing providence, such blessing. I'm glad I don't control this world. I am glad I don't have to endure the pain God must go through watching us all stumble,learning to pick ourselves up and walk. I don't understand all the pain I must also persevere through with Him...for there have been many a fallen soldier in my life.
I just have to trust Him. That's all I can say sometimes when I talk to God. "I trust you,I trust you,I chose to trust you" over and over,again and again.
He never leaves us alone in any of our pain and never gives us more than we can endure.
He matches our distresses,mishaps,disappointments,and suffering with His love and comfort...
As it says in II Corinthians 1:3-6:
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 5For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer."

So Merry Christmas everyone!
I hope and pray that this next year brings you ever closer to your family and friends. That you will find hope and peace in the direst of circumstances,and render yourself very much in love with the Giver of Life,the unchanging,faithful One.

Poem: "Sun-Kissed Goodnight"

Tapestries of golden shine
Red and rust fall and hang
From tears of rainclouds
To sultry summer wind chimes

Frozen wastelands glimmer
Smiling down upon snowdrifts
Crystals glow, and array of color
Illuminate dew on rose's lips

Shadows long, shadows cast
Darkness sure to align
To encompass all day past
Smothering slowly glowing embers
(The ashes to be lit on the morn' to come)

Sleepy eye, dreamy vision
River water sparkles radiant
Fields of green sway, awing
Rainbows of waterfall mist sigh

Creating surreality
Moments of peace
Dreams arise as sun sets

Song: "What Have I Done?"

Verse 1:
Press your picture to my heart
As I'm lying alone in the dark
I know you're with me inside
I just can't take your life

Chorus:
But I already have
I already have
And I can't get you back
(No I can't do that)
What have I done?
What can I do?
I just want to hold you
What have I done?

Verse 2:
I watch the children
Playing on the playground
Every little thing reminds me of you
How could anyone do such a thing?
How could anyone take one of their lives?

(Chorus)

Chorus Alt/Add:
What have we done
God, I'm broken
What have we done?

Bridge/Tag:
I can hear you, I can see you
I can feel you all night
[Spoken]Dear Lord,forgive me(As I lay me down to sleep)
Forgive me,please(I pray Lord,my soul to keep)

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I have written two other songs directly facing the desperate situation of the killing of the unborn and the regrets and effects of that. This is just another to add to the crying out, the sorrow.

Song: "Wake Up"

Verse 1:
When you're alone
On crowded street
Then you turn around
And see the faceless ones
You've been counting on

When you're the one
Someone is looking to
For the meaning of passion

Chorus:
Wake up! Wake up!
You've been sleeping for so long
Wake up!

Verse 2:
When your hope is wearing thin
And you're barely warmed
By the flame of faith within

When your heart so soft
Becomes a heart of stone
The bitterness grown
Cause you're screaming
In the deafest of ears

(Chorus)

Bridge:
You're not dead
You're just asleep
You're not dead
And God's not done with you yet

(Chorus/Tag to End):
The season of passivity is gone
You can't live their anymore(x2)

Wake up,you dry and weary bones!
Wake up,dance before your Lord!

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I wrote this song the night one of my good friends',the Black's, house caught fire and burnt completely...I was singing at the church,and God just had me singing the words "wake up" over and over. The reason everyone was able to safely escape the house was that the mom of the family had woken up and sounded the alarm. I don't know if that was coincidence or not but it was pretty cool nonetheless.

Song: "Running" [[Olivia's Song.]]

Verse 1:
I watched your five-star performance
All of your life you took the stage well
But you couldn't keep switching masks forever
You must have thought breaking hearts was better

Chorus:
You let it all go,let it all go
Let it burn,let it fall,lost it all
Even though I miss you,love you,
And wish you were here
You can't help someone when they're
Running in the opposite direction

Verse 2:
You got this mirage of happiness
For the moment it feels like it lasts
Someday it'll occur for better or worse
Remembering will bring you back
Since you...

(Chorus)

Bridge:
Come home,my friend
My arms are as open
As they've always been

(Chorus)

Song: "All Those Heroes"

Verse 1:
The leaves are falling on the ground
The wind moves her hair across her face
Catches a tear of disgrace
She's broken, shattered, and torn
She's been bruised, battered, and scorned

Chorus:
Cast the stone if you can
Pass the blame, sinless man
Who are you, who am I
Who are we to make them cry?

Verse 2:
Summer's come and summer's gone
He sought for love he can't replace
Made a mess,made mistakes
He's wandering,lost,and restless
He's been left alone and hopeless

(Chorus)

Bridge:
All those heroes
Looking for a heart to win
All those dreamers
On the edge of a dream
Always reaching for something
Just out of reach
But when it's wrong,it's all wrong
And when it's gone,it's all gone

(Chorus)

A Radical : A Hero

Sometimes I find myself trying to fit into my "old man's" shoes(as opposed to new man...not my Dad). I try to communicate a solution to our problems without bringing God directly into it. Why do I do that??

It's not because of anxiety, fear of rejection, or shame...it is because I'm afraid of what I have to become: A Radical.
Being a radical is the only way to communicate, relay, transpose our passion for our love for God, and His love for us, to others. My generation(the Heroes) have to realize that a hero is not some laid-back groupie, a tag-along, a club member, an independent and shining individual, or even a prominent leader. They are a soldier.
Soldiers and heroes have much in common. One big parallel is they see no other choice except to fight for justice and freedom...for truth. Radical? You bet.


In the words of Nelson Mandella:
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light,not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves,'who am I to be brilliant,gorgeous,talented,and fabulous?' Actually,who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are born to manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

So to all you heroes,you radicals..."Be not afraid of greatness..."(Shakespeare)
And..."Never forget that life can only be rightly inspired and rightly lived if you take it bravely and gallantly, as a splendid adventure in which you are settling into an unknown country,to face many a danger,to meet many a joy,to find many a comrade,to win and lose many a battle."(Annie Besant)

Song:"Where Do We Go From Here?"

Verse 1:
When lies make up the truth
That everyone believes
Everybody follows but nobody leads
Waiting for freedom to pay its own price
Hoping we'll never have to open our eyes

Chorus:
You don't feel the fear til it's smothering
The joy that you knew
And the faith that you thought was so close
So secure in your heart disappears
Oh where do we go from here?
(God)Where do we go from here?

Verse 2:
When love is the explosive
That makes our hearts bleed
Everyone's misunderstood,so everyone agrees
We know things don't change til we hit our knees
But still demand respect and liberty

(Chorus)

Bridge:
When man becomes the law
And law becomes a beggar
When innocence falls
And guilt is our protector
When we forget the reason we're here
Then wonder why all our plans fail
Where do we go from here?

(Chorus)
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This was written the day of the election. Enough said.

Song:"Where Do We Go From Here?"

Song: "Beautiful Lie"

Verse 1:
It's hard to know where you stand
When you're sitting in silence
With your face in your hands
It's hard to know where you fit
When you don't know the shape that you're in

Everything changes it seems
Like how love blows ashes into dreams
Ohh oohh...

Chorus:
Why,what a beautiful lie
Imitation so sweet
Ripped my heart from your hands
Dropped to my knees
I wish I was a bird
Drifting with the wind
Never to hurt,
Never to cry again

Verse 2:
You can't appreciate the pain
Til you experience some for yourself
It's hard to find your way
When you don't know that you're lost

I know somewhere in your heart
Is the freeing light that you fear
Ohh...oohh...

(Chorus)

Song: "In The Stillness"

Verse 1:
I've been waiting here in the stillness
I've been searching so long
For the strength

Bridge:
And you come to me
And you hold me
And you fill me, oh God

Chorus 1:
Your love is my portion
It's the fire I can run with
Your grace is the only miracle
I need to believe

Verse 2:
I see you standing there in the stillness
Open-armed,teary-eyed
You say, "Child,here I am"

(Bridge)

Chorus 2:
Your arms are my shelter
In your shadow I find rest
This peace so amazing
Passes all understanding

Verse 3:
Here I stand in my armor
Waiting for the battle
I can feel it,I can hear it
Like a calm before the storm

(Bridge)

Chorus 3:
Your truth is my compass
It's the light by which I see
Your blood won my healing
And the victory that I seek


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I was praying for a long time to God for a deeper revelation of His heart for worship and everything else. And in that,the ability to start putting music and words together to express that. I'm merely crossing the threshold really,yet He's empowered me to start experiencing more of His presence,His direction,His voice in my worship and through prayer. This is the first song I was able to put words to music,and music to words.

To Whom It May Concern...

I wanna write a song that says exactly how I feel
Something I could shout to let everything out

I wanna have a place where no one could hear me scream
A sound proof valley of solitude where I could walk til I find myself again

Right now theres more fulfillment in the thinking without the feeling
And dancing in the rain than simply looking through the windowpane

If only,if only...no I don't want to hear that now
No I don't want you to hold me...I want to walk the world awhile

I wish I could see it...my future...I know its right there
Why can't I see it? The next step's right in front of me...somewhere.

I wanna take every breath as something to cherish
I want the world to be perfect...in short,I'm kidding myself.

I have what it takes...at least thats what I like to think
Why does nothing seem to hold any purpose for me except what I cannot touch but only dream of?

You could never be the only thing to hold me up and carry me through the sky
I need to be able to use these wings I've grown. Time,please release me...please just let me fly.

I want out of this place called tension and apprehension.
Like a prison cell without the bars...because I see no light,my eyes are darkened.

I want to save the...wait,nevermind...what is there good to save right now?
Feelings,emotions,tears,a sore body,an aching heart,a bleeding spirit,a dying soul...who wants those?

Yes. I feel trapped and burdened. And...so...
The dust of despair is brushed over all my hopes.

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More than I'd like to admit, this is a mirror to the depths of my soul.
Perhaps its not a far cry to what everyone else feels as well, in the unspoken inner conversations. We learn though, painfully we learn, that God is stronger than we are...and He saves us just as our fragile hearts begin to crack. As our faith gives way,and the last bone in our body is about to break,but instead surrenders to the overwhelming desire to just let go and be held in brokenness by the only One who can repair us.

Song:"Heartbeat of Heroes"

Intro:
All the people passing by
Do they know?
All the people passing by
Can't they hear?
The winds of change
Can they feel it? Can you feel it?

Verse 1:
Sitting on a bench on main street
Thinking up reasons not to sing
He's writing up a list in his head
Of things he might do instead
Picks at the six strings
Maybe someone will hear

Chorus 1:
All the people passing by
Can they see?
All the people passing by
Will they hear?
He's waiting for the silence to speak
To all the people passing by(x2)

Verse 2:
She's making your cup of coffee
Service with a smile and a burning heart
You blow right back out the door
Never thinking she could be so much more

Chorus 2:
All the people passing by
Can they see?
all the people passing by
Do they know?
That she's searching for a love that sets her free
From all the people passing by(x2)

Give them that moment of truth
Without the lies
Be the courage that opens their eyes

Listen for the heartbeat of heroes

Song:"What Do You Want Me To Do?"

Verse 1:
God I'm here
What do you want me to do?
God I'm listening now
Is it too late to hear your voice?
I don't want to lose this time
I'll take a hard choice over a bad choice
What do you want me to do?

I feel alone God
Even if I know you're always with me
I'm standing here God
To show you I'm willing
To do what it takes,to give it all to you
What do you want me to do?

Chorus:
I raise my voice
I lift my head
My tears won't stop
My heart aches to know
What do you want me to do?

Verse 2:
God I'm shaking
I can't stand the weight of this world
God I'm quiet now
Please speak to me
What do you want me to do?
I'm willing and ready to fight

Bridge:
Let the rain fall
I won't move
Let the walls burn
I won't move
Let my heart break
I won't move
Until I feel you move

Alternate Chorus:
I hear a battlecry
I lift my sword high
My tears won't stop
My heart aches to do
What you want me to do
What do you want me to do?

Enemy At The Gates

Sit down restless soul,I have a story to tell
Wisdom hath knocked upon Justice's door
And plot to thrive against apathy's swell

Listen, for they shall speak of Truth
In the ears of the slumbering to wake them
The wind they shall petition to sing of it
The very oceans shall roar in melodious tides
So sweet shall it sound,but harsh

Take head, Oh wandering heart
Find thine burden here in silence
As the voices of discretion whisper
To thy deepest dreams, thus far, uninspired

Let not thine spirit be troubled
Yield thy soul to respond under its tension
For surrender thus to integrity it must
Else the beating of thine heart groweth cold

Hear the war-beat
The trails of the soldier now trodden upon
Harken to the clang of the anvil on hot metal
Come thence to the fire
Be put under the Welders hand
Render thyself and be made into magnificence

The sword of belief shalt thou become
A weapon of hope and undefeated malice
Against the darkness, against the lies

Be history
Be made whole
Awake and be made known
In the story of time and providence
Carve your name

The Enemy is at the gates
Arm thyself with strength and passion
Joy your strength,life your passion

The Enemy is at the gates
Surrender not

The Pursuit of Happiness:

What Is Happiness? Where Can It Be Found?

Happiness is a mixed emotion.

It is easy to fake happiness so I will make a distinction perhaps; I'll define (from my own perspective of course) shallow or immediate happiness and then true,deep happiness.

First,that instant-gratification sort of happiness. The one that comes out in a laugh or smile at a joke or a tickle,when you've escaped your life for the night at the pub or backroom,or ....maybe being wrapped up in the arms of someone you momentarily are expressing yummy feelings towards? Its that wreckless emotional,up and down sort of happiness. I have to explain that there is an innocent sort of this happiness...the naivety of a child growing into a teenager,not knowing what they will have to struggle for now.

I guess thats a good way to describe my next definition: true happiness. That free,blissful depth of joy that children dwell in. If thats not happiness,I don't know what is.
As people putting off childish things, we can't know that same happiness anymore. We aren't meant to, because we are supposed to grow up. So we should move into a different type of the same happiness: genuine surrender. Ok,I know what you're thinking...."What the heck? Thats not the answer I thought it'd be." Am I right? So genuine surrender...its the extent of humility. Surrender to what? Well first to God,the steward of all prosperity,hope,love,dreams,peace,and yes,happiness. And then to the just laws and authority He has placed in your life. That would include loving your neighbor as yourself.

I think the best source of happiness is relationships. Not just lovey-dovey. Thats not enough, though it's a vital part. I mean family, friends, pastors, leaders, teachers, younger generations, older generations, and most important?...you guessed it...God. When you are relating right to everyone around you and above you, you are surrounded by release. A release of happiness. Even in the times of trial, struggle, loss, failure, and grief. Every tear can be faced with joy. Not out of insanity and unreality, but in the reality of providence: that all things will work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose. (P.S. That applies to everyone.)

Its so simple: Happiness is free-falling.
Not hindered,not unjust,nor foolish. It's trusting.

Happiness is letting go. It can be found in a willing heart,a sober mind,and an upright,courageous spirit.

Poem: "The House Of Innocence"

Remember the innocence
Like a house in which we used to live
We moved because we wanted to be big

The times of making whistles in the long grass
Digging our toes into wet sand
Playing cowboys and army
Ballerinas and horses

Definite security in our own imagination
What we thought was real,was real
And what we wanted to be would be

The castles in the sky
True loves kiss to wake the dead
Little boys fake machine guns noise
Lived to scare the girls away

Now we long to step onto that threshold
And to fit ourselves under the door
To play with our plastic kitchen play set
And only pretend about real blood and real war

To shout "I'm bulletproof,I'm invincible"
And really believe it once more
To hold hands with pure,friendly feelings
To blush at a kiss on the cheek
To giggle and laugh unencumbered
To run and not become weak
To believe in love again
To believe anything again

O, to be young
O, to sit on daddy's lap
To be eager to learn and ask silly questions
When "I'm sorry" and a hug meant forgive and forget

There's not a point in our lives
We won't forget
The house in which we used to live
The house of innocence

Reviving Hope

[[DUM SIPRO,SPERO]] "While I breathe,I hope."

How do I give hope to people? I want to know. I wish it was easier to impart. You see my struggle? I hope to change lives. But how are they going to recieve what I'm saying when I haven't experienced what its like to feel deep pain or grief or abuse or hopelessness? How do I wake them up? I wish I knew. I want something more to show for my every day...I hope I can,I hope.

What is hope? Its definitley not physically tangible, it's internal. An emotion? A feeling? A sense? I guess its optimism...but the beginnings of it. Maybe hope is a way of travel,not a destination. Its a means,not an end.

Definitions from dictionary.com and WikiPedia:

To look forward to with desire and reasonable confidence.
To believe, desire, or trust.
Expectancy, longing.

Hope is a belief in a positive outcome related to events and circumstances in one's life. Hope implies a certain amount of despair, wanting, wishing, suffering or perseverance — i.e., believing that a better or positive outcome is possible even when there is some evidence to the contrary.

Wise Words About Hope:

"Hoping does not mean doing nothing. It is not fatalistic resignation. It means going about our assigned tasks, confident that God will provide the meaning and the conclusion. It is not compelled to work away at keeping up appearances with a bogus spirituality. It is the opposite of desperate and panicky manipulations, of scurrying and worrying. And hoping is not dreaming. It is not spinning an illusion or fantasy to protect us from our boredom or our pain. It means a confident, alert expectation that God will do what he said he will do. It is imagination put in the harness of faith. It is a willingness to let God do it in his way and in his time. It is the opposite of making plans that we demand that God put into effect, telling him both how and when to do it."
-- Eugene Peterson.

"Hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who so hopes strongly has within him the gift of miracles."
-- Samuel Smiles.

"To hope means to be ready at every moment for that which is not yet born, and yet not become desperate if there is no birth in our lifetime."
-- Erich Fromm.

Random Ramblings

I'm not really sure of myself....what to write.

I know,sitting here in the light of the sun setting behind the mountains,listening to the sprinklers rotations,and watching the wind move through the grass that I am in a blessed place. For a moment everything looks as beautiful and serene as it should be,eventhough the rest of the world screams of chaos. I am warmed by the yellow rays of sun and cooled by the soft breeze. It is perfect. How much would the average American give for this? I believe it would be alot...
I don't have any qualifying traits or virtues,no reason in the world that this wonderful view would be bestowed on me. It is not like I deserved this somehow...but here I am. I know I am not grateful for it and I take it forgranted alot of the time. But...Thank you God.

What does the word 'life' make you think of? Whats a good word picture for it?
I think of a roller coaster. All the dips,curves,ups and downs....the slow treks up and the sudden stops...backwards,forwards,upside-down....beginning and end. Some people tend to enjoy the ride more than others. Some fear they will fall and so they close their eyes and grit their teeth. Some throw their hands in the air with a smile on their face,thrilled with every second. Some simply go along for the ride and some wish they never got on.

Life is about more than the mountaintop. It's what you do in the valley that sets you apart.

How Should the Bibles True Revelation About Abortion Apply to Our Own Lives and the Life of the Church?

We were all fetuses once. We were all concieved,carried,and birthed. And as the Bible says in Psalm 139:
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."


God created us,body,soul,mind,and spirit. God views us as a living,functional being from conception. He chooses to make us,to guide and protect us,and to give His only Son for our sake. We must remember this and show our gratitude to our Creator. He did not leave us in darkness,He gave us a light to show us the way. He did not bind us,He gave us an intelligence and a free will. He did not enslave us to sin,He sacrificed His son so that we might have everlasting life. We must rejoice also in the fact that He gave us parents who did not abort us,but treasure and love us.(In regards to those who have to live under unfortunate circumstances concerning their parents,I am indeed sorry. But do not forget that you are alive,and life is precious,someone gave you that life.) We should take great care to steward what He has given us(bodies,minds,souls,and spirits). We should also become well-related to our Maker. God created all of us a certain way,with certain destinies; and,the fulfillment of those destinies relies on a right relationship with Him and aligning our dreams with His own. As a part of the life of the church,being a Christian; it is my duty to not only pursue God's plans,but to seek to give life to the rest of the body by learning to function in the spirit properly.

As a church, we have the responsibility to live according to God's law and to direct those in fellowship with us in that same way. If we know what is right but see our nation doing wrong, we have to make a response. We have NO excuse for not taking a stand,knowing our position, and speaking out of a revelation of the truth. We are supposed to be the salt and light,the bearers of good news,and the planters of the seeds of life and liberty. How are we doing our job if we allow sin and death to prevail? Frankly,we are not.

Have You Ever Been In The Presence Of God's Holiness?

Holiness is such a nearly indescribable word. God's holiness is such a nearly indescribable feeling or thought,notion or experience. I have never felt that, except in my times of full surrender. Because God has placed a special heart for worship in me, those times usually occur when I'm before Him in praise, humbleness, and inquiry through worship. I have never felt it in the exact same way, it isn't some spiritual peak that you get to, it isn't a conjuring. I'm afraid no matter how much you try, you could never achieve that level of vulnerability without the Holy Spirit. When I know that I know I am before a Holy God, and that Holiness is apparent and vivid, my first reaction or feeling is a sense of wanting to just hide my imperfections. When your impurities are so obvious to your own self, you do feel vulnerable and open. Something like,"I have nothing to offer,except imperfection". Then in His holy,perfect love he touches us and lifts us up,once we see our inadequecies. It is a tender moment when you feel helpless to your fallenness,which we are without God, and even then He never leaves us without hope.

Poem: "Hold Fast"

I wish there was something that I could do or say
That would make all of this just go away
A tender touch to help you trust
And all your burdens fall to dust

Many a mile I know you've tread
And many a breath spent living for death
Time doesn't give you much hope
And patience is a feeble way to cope

It isn't easy watching you hurt
The pain cut deep and the anger burn
I don't know how to bring you faith
Or a genuine smile to your face

It isn't that I'm giving up
It's not that there's nothing left
"It's not that I'm still holding on
I'm never letting go"

Be free of the ache
Let loose your cage
Don't settle for darkness and despair
There is no peace there

Destruction is not your only path
There's something to build,
Something to last
Finding out love can stand fast
And dreams don't have to fade

Hold fast,my dearest friend

God Is In Control

Times like these
When my life is slow
When my world crashes
But my dreams lie intact
When storms rage then cease
When I am saved from pain
When I find peace in adversity
This is when I know
God is in control

Moments of joy
Flickers of happy memories
When I remember special songs
When a smile breaks across my face
The laughing for no reason
When theres stillness in the chaos
And that calm keeps me alive
That is when I feel
God is in control

When I have no words to say but 'I love you'
The hugs and the tears
When I kiss the forehead of a dying friend
When I hold a new life in my arms
The times that I've spent on my knees
And others running away
When in all the darkness I find light
Then is when I see
God is in control

When I hear the music of the wind
The birds sing to me the harmony
Trees sway and clap to the anthem
And the oceans beat against the shore
Then in all of the noise of the world
I hear a still small voice
Thats when I hear
God is in control

When I dance without fear
When I find unadulterated truth
When I look at the stars
When I sleep deep and well
When I know there is hope
Every second I breathe
God is in control

Poem:"Alive"

Swaying to the music at midnight
I make a smile at the full moon
And carry on the dance
The stars sing a melody
The milky way moves with me
Eyes closed to the darkness
I step out on the wind

And I'm carried away
The clouds clear,the sounds ring true
And nothing stands in the way of the morning
When the sun will break through
And I will go to be with you

The cold has become so stinging
My thin skin holds no weight in this world
I hope my children remember
To hold on to the warmth while it lasts
The curse of youth is
That beauty belongs to the past

On the morrow
My reflection will not cause me pain
In the light of the Son
My bones will remember their strength

When I leave my footprints on the earth
And walk on a staircase of swirling airs
To the place of golden streets of rebirth
And to the tender fountain of grace
Please rejoice in my going
Think fondly in knowing
I will be with you all of your years

Gentle scents of the dew fall on my lips
I hear the morning-bird singing
The sunrise is hastening on
I am being drawn up to the arms
The everlasting arms of rest
My head now lies against his chest
I feel like I can dance
I am truly alive

Poem:"Marine At Mt. Suribachi"

Their country's flag soon to unfurl
Atop a mount of useless woe
For upon that day doom had fallen
Six would come, four would go and
Only memory could revive
The precious moments of their lives
The stories don't recompense their cries

Agony upon a beach
Writhing pain nevermore to cease
Dying for days and days on end
Our guilty soil to defend
The captive soldier best not hope
For soon enough he'll die by rope

On that day you'd hear angels sing:
"If the Army and the Navy
Ever look on heaven's scenes
They will find the streets are guarded
By United State Marines"

A doctor,a farmboy,an indian
A teammate,a leader,a follower
Together forged a vision
Of desire,hope,and strength
A symbol of unity
A rise in morale to make

Forever and eternity
Rememberance of the war
The debt we have,the blood they shed
The freedom they insured

For soldier on, they do
And fight the good fight o'er
The seas,the earth,the wild lands
For all the world to see
Determined to destruction
They sacrifice their years
They thunder in,with gun hand
In a rain of blood,sweat,and tears

Those who carry on the burden
Of the comrades now deceased
Flashbacks filled with horror
Wake them furious in their sleep
Peace,peace they seek for
They hang their heads in despair
Why did I not die alongside
All the others who were there?

No matter what the cost
In the end,they would never
Take back the choice
To raise their voice
Shout "gung ho"
And boldly go
Where a few good men
Have never gone before

America now stands
Home of the free
Because of the brave
A warrior til your dying day
No mortal can undo your deeds
Some men must die
So others can sleep

Semper fidus,Semper fidelis
Always faithful, ever-true
All men of war
Hats off to you

---------------------------------
I wrote this after having seen Flags of Our Fathers and reading the book. Soldiers have always inspired me,and their sacrifice is among the most honorable of all. Thank you Men of War,Men of Honor....you will be remembered.

It Doesn't Interest Me...

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

I doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you're telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. I want to know of you can be faithful and therefore be trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it is not pretty everyday, and if you can source yourself from God's presence. I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver moon, Yes!

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done for the children.

I doesn't interest me who you are, how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself, and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

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Quite the interesting thought-provoking blip(and so true to what I feel in my heart towards others). I'm sure this has curculated thousands of blogs,emails,etc. already...but alas,it was too good to not post it yet again.

Song:"Goodbye My Friend"

Verse 1:
Packing your bags for freedom
Pretending you have a clue
You say you gotta get outta here
No matter how much I need you

Takin the pain for granted
Takin hope as lost
No one ever told you
How much heartache cost

Chorus:
Goodbye my friend
You're takin off
In the wrong direction
I ain't worried
Someday the wind will
Bring you back to me
But for now,so long
Goodbye my friend

Verse 2:
Callin me to let me know
You're doin just great
You've found a man

And you're settin a date
I watch you smile at the altar
Eighteen and 3 months along
You're already showin
Tatoo of roses
You've gotten good
At covering up the bruises

Bridge:
Yeah I got the baby pictures
Right next to the ones of graduation
I just wish I could remember
Our last long conversation
I understand,you gotta lot on your mind
I made it to yours
You can't make it to mine

Verse 3:
I'm holding your hand lightly
Sittin by your hospital bed
A tear slips down my cheek
I've never seen you this weak

In your last seconds
You turn to me and say
I remembered Jesus
Cause I saw Him in your face

Chorus:
Goodbye my friend
You're takin off
In the right direction
No more worries
Today the wind
Brought you back to me
So for now,so long
Goodbye my friend

Tag:
Goodbye my friend
I'll be seein you
Goodbye my friend
When the mornin takes me too
Goodbye my friend(x2)

What makes a true Christian?

There are many facets to the answer of this question. I believe what makes a true Christian is their devotion,obedience,and belief. Consider the martyrs of the faith and the disciples,and of course our ultimate example,Jesus. The freedom we will experience through Christs atoning sacrifice comes to us with a battle and a commision. Often we expect all the blessings and the ability to skip from mountain top experience to mountain top experience,and don't realize the valleys and the losses we must also endure. Being a Christian does not mean we have a "free pass" through life. We must still face the difficulties of the world. But in those struggles,in that battle, we have God to give us hope. What must characterize a true Christian is there devotion to desiring the will of their Father and not of their own,understanding that all things happen for a reason,God's reason. Also their obedience to that will,the guidance of His Almighty gracious hands leading us on,especially when that means they must give up comfort and normality. They have to be considerably different(In the world but not of it). Christians must believe in God's Word,not just a part,but the whole of the Truth.

Song:"Listen For The Song"

Verse 1:
You fall apart in my arms tonight
And I'm prayin for you
Helpin your heart lie open
Waitin for the rain to fall
To wash away the pain of it all
Of losing everything for nothin

1st Chorus:
Wait,theres the sunset lookin up
Hear the sound of water rush
Take my breath away,take my breath away
Put on a smiley face
Wipe those tear-filled eyes clear
Listen for the song I hear
Comin on the wind,comin on the wind
Comin in a breath

Verse 2:
You're not satisfied with the way it is
How the rest of the world lives
Day to day
Kissin their futures so long
Wavin goodbye to the train they shoulda been on
Ticket in hand,they just don't understand

2nd Chorus:
Go on,reach for something more
Different from all of us
If you missed the train,well catch a bus
Leave the dark world behind
Sail off into the life waiting for you
Waitin for you,waitin for you

Verse 3:
Picture a little girl
Pretty blue eyes and light blonde curls
Lookin up at me
Waiting to see if I'll fall apart
Just like her family

3rd Chorus:
Don't think I'll hold back
From givin everything I have
To see those eyes come alive
Like fireflies in the night
Don't lose the hope that you'll find
The truth behind the lies
And passion to believe

All man will find the same,someday

(Break)

Last Chorus:
I see a mornin breakin free
Sun shinin down on me
Take my fears away,take my fears away
Live again,free with Him
And grace falls like rain
Rollin down the windowpane
Onto my lips
Help me breathe again
Faith is comin back to me
Like a boomerang against the breeze

Tag:
No more swaying with the trees
I gotta stone in my hand
To plant with my feet
To plant right with my dreams